MyHealth.Alberta.ca Network

Student FAQs

We have included a list of common questions from students to help you prepare responses. The questions are categorized by topics, rather than grades, as the responses are just meant as a starting point. Your response to a student question should be adapted to your student’s age, maturity, the classroom environment and individual school policies.

The uterus is a reproductive organ found in the pelvis where a fetus would grow. Removing the uterus is a major surgery called a hysterectomy. It is done to manage serious health problems. After the surgery, the person stays in the hospital for a while and needs healing time at home. After a hysterectomy, the person won’t get periods anymore and can’t get pregnant. If ovaries are also removed, they person will stop releasing eggs and make less estrogen.

The vagina is muscular and a person’s vagina is the right shape and size right for them. It doesn’t get “loose” from sex. Pregnancy and birth, menopause, some health problems and vaginal injuries can weaken vaginal (pelvic floor) muscles, which can be a problem. A doctor or physiotherapist can teach special exercises to help strengthen these muscles.

Douching is washing the inside of the vagina with fluid. Vaginas are self-cleaning so douching is unnecessary. Douching gets in the way of the self-cleaning process and can lead to infection or injury. It’s healthy to clean the outside part of the genitals (labia) with water and, if wanted, unscented, gentle soap.

The vagina, cervix and healthy vaginal bacteria all make fluids that help keep the vagina clean and healthy by removing dead cells and germs and keeping a healthy chemical balance. Cleaning the inside of the vagina can interfere with this process and can lead to infection or injury. It is healthy to clean the outside part of the genitals (labia) with water and, if wanted, unscented, gentle soap.

Vaginal discharge is a fluid made by the vagina, cervix and healthy bacteria that helps keep the vagina healthy. Vaginal fluid helps remove dead cells and germs, keeps a healthy chemical balance in the vagina and lubricates during sex. There is always some vaginal fluid and it increases during puberty. The amount and type of discharge changes through the menstrual cycle and through life. It’s normal and healthy to have vaginal discharge. If you notice changes in color, texture or smell of discharge, talk to a health care provider.

The G-Spot, or Grafenberg Spot, is an area about 5-7 cm in the vagina just behind the front wall. For some people, touching this area may be sexually arousing.

Begin having regular Pap tests starting at age 25, or 3 years after becoming sexually active, whichever is later. For example:

  • If you’re 17 and are already sexually active: You don’t need to start having Pap tests until you’re 25.
  • If you’re not sexually active until 25: You don’t need to start having Pap tests until you’re 28.

A pap test is where a health care provider takes a sample of cells from the cervix (the narrow passage at the bottom of the uterus that connects to the vagina) to make sure it’s healthy.  Abnormal cells or cell changes can show up if someone has HPV, a common infection. The changes often get better on their own. However, they may lead to cancer if they persist and are not treated. Because it often takes a long time before they become cancer, regular Pap tests will usually catch the changes in time to be treated.

A pap test is where a health care provider looks at and takes a cell sample from the cervix (narrow passage at the bottom of the uterus that connects to the vagina) to make sure it’s healthy.  Abnormal cells or cell changes can show if someone has HPV, which can lead to cancer if not treated.

The cervix is a narrow passage at the bottom of the uterus that connects to the vagina. Menstrual fluid leaves the uterus through the cervix, and sperm enter the uterus through the cervix. The cervix “holds in” the fetus during pregnancy and softens and widens during labour to allow the baby to pass through. 

Ejaculation is when semen is released from the penis. 

Inside the scrotum at the back of each testicle is a structure called the epididymis. It’s where sperm is stored after being made by the testicles. Yes, it’s supposed to be there.

Yes, it’s normal if one testicle is bigger or lower in the scrotum (ball sac). Some people notice this, others don’t. Get to know what your testicles and scrotum look and feel like and tell your health care provider if you notice any changes.

Testicles are reproductive organs that make sperm and some hormones.

Although penises are sometimes called boners when they are erect, they don’t contain a bone to break.  However, if an erect penis hits something hard with force there can be damage to the tissues and blood vessels in the penis. This is a serious medical emergency.

There is nothing someone can do to make their penis grow. The penis will grow on the schedule and to the size that is right for the person. Getting enough rest, water, nutrition, exercise and managing stress can help you grow as healthy as possible. Trying to make a penis larger through devices, drugs or “natural products” can cause serious health problems.

Many people wonder about penis size. The average adult penis is about 12 cm (5 inches) when erect. It’s normal to have a penis bigger or smaller than average. Penis size isn’t related to the ability to give or receive sexual pleasure or create a pregnancy.

An erection happens when the brain sends a signal to the body to fill the penis with blood, making the penis harder. This reflex can happen because of a sexy thought, feeling or as a reaction to certain sights, sounds, smells or touch. Erections usually go away on their own or after ejaculation (releasing semen through the urethra). Erections can happen more often and unexpectedly during puberty.

Erections do not commonly hurt. They are a normal part of sexual arousal. No two people are exactly the same in how they respond sexually. The genital skin is loose and mobile, which allows for the penis to get larger and harder during an erection.

If you experience pain during an erection or when ejaculating you should talk to your health care provider.

Blue balls is a slang term for the achy feeling and bluish color some people get in their genital area if they’ve been sexually aroused for a long time. Some people notice this feeling especially strong in the testicles.  Because the blood that has built up in the genital area is not returning to pick up more oxygen, it can make the skin in the area a bit bluish in colour. This cannot hurt you.  As soon as the blood begins to move away from the genital area, which can happen if the person has an orgasm or is not sexually aroused anymore, the discomfort usually goes away quickly.

Some people use the idea of blue balls as an excuse to pressure other people to have sex with them.  This type of pressure is coercion and is not part of a healthy consent conversation. 

Semen is sticky because it has a sugar called fructose in it, which gives energy to sperm. Semen is the fluid that comes out of the penis during ejaculation. It’s made up of sperm, water, sugars, and minerals. 

No, they cannot come out at the same time. Pee is another word for urine. Semen is the fluid that contains sperm. Semen can only come out when the penis is hard. When the penis is hard, urine cannot pass through the urethra, which is the opening at the tip of the penis. So no, while sperm and urine both pass through the urethra, they can’t come out at the same time.

 

Before birth, the penis develops with loose skin covering the head of the penis (the glans), called the foreskin. The foreskin is the skin and tissue that cover the head of a soft (flaccid) penis. The foreskin pulls back when the penis is hard (erect). Circumcision is when the foreskin has been removed, usually shortly after birth. It’s often done by a doctor or trained religious person. Some people are circumcised and some are not. It is not usually medically necessary, but can be a part of a person’s faith or culture. A circumcised penis looks different from an uncircumcised penis because there’s no foreskin covering the end, but both work the same way. People who aren’t circumcised gently pull back the foreskin and wash around the head of the penis every day.

Impotent means that a person with a penis is unable to get and/or maintain an erection, or ejaculate regularly. It is also known as erectile dysfunction. An erection happens when the brain sends a signal to the body to fill the penis with blood, making the penis harder. Erectile dysfunction can happen for many different reasons, including mental, emotional and physical factors. If it is something you are concerned about, you can talk to a health care provider.

Breasts are made of nerves, arteries, blood vessels, milk ducts, fat tissue, connective fibers and lymph channels. Everyone has breast tissue and everyone gets some breast development during puberty. People with ovaries will have more breast development than people with testicles.  People with ovaries have more breast development as part of puberty, as preparation to make breastmilk if they have a baby in the future.

Yes, some people have one breast that is bigger or a different shape than the other. During puberty, when breasts are growing, they change shape and size until they are fully developed. During this time, you may notice that one breast is bigger. Breasts usually even out as they develop, but if they end up being slightly different sizes that’s normal too. If you notice that one breast is all of a sudden larger than the other or you’re worried about your breasts, talk to a health care provider.

Breasts don’t always have milk in them. When a person is pregnant, their body makes hormones to get the breasts ready to feed the baby after it’s born. Once the baby is born, the hormones signal the breasts to start making milk. When the baby breastfeeds, milk leaves the breast and the hormones keep signaling the breasts to make more milk.

The hymen is a fold of tissue within the vagina that partially covers the opening. The hymen is usually there at birth, although people can also be born without a hymen. Hymens can be different shapes and sizes. The hymen is flexible tissue, and it usually stretches/wears away during childhood from activities like bike riding or gymnastics. If the hymen hasn’t stretched/ worn away and someone has vaginal sex, it might partially block the partner from entering the vagina. If the sex is forceful, it can tear, causing bleeding and pain. Because the hymen is flexible, it doesn’t always tear from sex. 

A womb is another word for a uterus. The uterus is a reproductive organ where a fetus grows during pregnancy.

A pelvic exam is part of a regular physical check-up.  During the exam, a health care provider examines the pelvic organs (vagina, cervix, uterus and ovaries).  During a pelvic exam you might be checked:

  • to make sure the reproductive organs are healthy
  • for sores and lumps on the genitals
  • for sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
  • for infections in the vagina (e.g., yeast or bacterial vaginosis)

 

Yes. Some people are born with both a penis and a vagina or parts of each. This is called ‘intersex’. Intersex is when someone’s body doesn’t match what we traditionally think of as either male or female: they have some body characteristics of both. About 1.7% of people are intersex. 

Most anatomical and medical words come from Latin. Penis comes from the Latin word for tail, and vagina comes from the Latin word for a sheath or covering.

Plan B is one brand of emergency contraception pill. It prevents pregnancy after sex by stopping the release of eggs and stopping sperm from fertilizing eggs. It does NOT end pregnancy. 

Birth control can make skin healthier. Bad acne is often caused by hormones. Birth control helps to balance hormones, so doctors might prescribe birth control to manage bad acne.

The birth control pill, patch and ring can cause short term bloating that goes away in a few weeks. The birth control injection and the implant can cause weight gain for some people.

Most people find that hormonal birth control makes periods shorter, lighter and more regular. Copper IUDs can make periods a bit longer and heavier.

Yes, some types of birth control can be used to safely stop periods. This is done by not taking a hormone-free break when on the patch, ring and some types of pills. Talk to a health care provider to learn more.

On its own, birth control provides good protection from pregnancy only. Many people use birth control plus a condom so they have protection from STIs plus back up for the birth control.

It depends on what a person uses correctly and consistently. Abstinence gives 100% pregnancy and STI protection. The birth control implant and hormone IUDs have the highest effectiveness rates. Condoms give good STI protection and act as back up to other birth control.

All of your visits to any health care provider are recorded. Your health records are confidential. Other health care providers might have limited access to your health record; other people don’t. If you pay for birth control on someone else’s health insurance, it shows up on their insurance statement.

If you’ve stopped having sex and are thinking about stopping birth control, talk to a health care provider. Sometimes it’s a good choice to stay on birth control to help with periods, in case of unexpected sex and to avoid health risks from starting and stopping too often.

Ideally, people would start birth control before starting to do any activity where a penis or semen might come into close contact with the vaginal area. If someone’s already started having sex, the sooner they start birth control, the sooner they’re protected from pregnancy.

A condom is a thin covering that fits over a hard penis. It decreases the risk of pregnancy and STIs by creating a barrier that stops sperm and body fluids from passing between partners.

With typical use (not following exact directions) a condom is 82% effective. With perfect use a condom is 98% effective at preventing pregnancy. Condoms give good protection from STIs and HIV.

How to put on a condom:

  1. Check the expiry date (don’t use if expired). Squeeze the package to make sure it’s sealed—no air should come out.
  2. Push the condom to one end of the package. Open carefully at the other end. Don’t use scissors, fingernails, or teeth as you might damage the condom.
  3. Pinch the tip of the condom to squeeze out the air.
  4. Put the condom on the end of the hard penis. If not circumcised, pull back the foreskin.
  5. Unroll the condom all the way down the base of the penis.
  6. After you ejaculate (cum) and the penis is still hard, hold onto the condom and pull out.
  7. Carefully remove the condom and tie it in a knot to keep the fluid inside.
  8. Throw the used condom in the garbage—don’t flush it down the toilet.

Never reuse a condom. Never use two external condoms or an internal condom and external condom at the same time, as the risk of both breaking increases. The Using a Condom video shows you how to safely open, put on and dispose of a condom.

To ensure a condom is safe to use check the:

  • expiry date (don’t use if it’s expired)
  • the package (squeeze it to make sure it’s sealed-don’t use it if air comes out)

Latex and polyurethane condoms will help protect you from pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Lambskin condoms will help protect you from pregnancy, but not STIs or HIV. 

Yes, some condoms are flavoured. This is to encourage the use of condoms for oral sex. They can be used on a penis or can be used to make to make a dental dam for use during mouth-to-vaginal or mouth-to-anus oral sex.

Yes, you can store latex condoms in a wallet for up to 1 month. Condoms are sensitive to heat, cold, folding, sunlight, and rubbing. Keep condoms in their package, and store at room temperature and out of direct sunlight.

A vaginal condom is a soft, plastic (non-latex) sleeve with two flexible rings, one on each end. It’s sometimes called a female or internal condom. The closed, inner ring goes inside the vagina. The outer ring stays outside the vagina to cover the genitals. The vaginal condom is used for vaginal sex. It decreases the risk of pregnancy and STIs and HIV by stopping semen and body fluid from passing between partners.

With typical use (not following exact directions) a vaginal condom is 79% effective. With perfect use the vaginal condom is 95% effective at preventing pregnancy. Vaginal condoms give good protection from STIs and HIV.

Never use a vaginal and a male condom at the same time, as it increases the risk of both breaking. Condoms used with another method of birth control (pill, patch, injection, ring, IUD) give the best protection from pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Never reuse a condom.

The video Using an Internal (Vaginal) Condom shows you how to safely open, use and dispose of a vaginal condom.

There are many kinds of birth control methods. They include:

  • barrier methods (e.g., condoms)
  • hormonal methods (e.g., pill, patch, hormonal IUD, injection, implant, ring)
  • non-hormonal methods (e.g., copper IUD, fertility awareness, withdrawal or “pulling out”, abstinence (no sexual contact))

Talk to your health care provider or go to a sexual and reproductive health clinic to find out what birth control methods will work best for you.

A dental dam (also called an oral dam or latex barrier) is a thin rectangular piece of latex used to prevent the spread of STIs during oral sex in the anal or vaginal area. It helps to reduce spreading bodily fluids.  You can buy dental dams at some drugstores. You can make your own dam out of a condom (latex or non-latex). To make a dam you need a new, rolled up condom and a pair of scissors. Check the expiry date (don’t use if expired) and check that the package doesn’t have any holes.

  1. While the condom is still rolled up, cut the tip off.
  2. Keep the condom rolled and put the scissors through the middle and cut through 1 part of the ring.
  3. Unroll the condom and place over vulva or anus before performing oral sex. 
    • Lubricant can help the dam stick to the skin so it stays in place. 
    • Lubricant should be water-based or silicon-based. Oil-based lubricants should not be used as they can break the dental dam. 

The Using a Dental Dam Video shows how to make, use and dispose of a dental dam.

  1. Before use, hold it up to the light and check for holes.
  2. Hold the dental dam in place on the anal or vaginal area and don’t let it flip over. Consider marking one side so you know which side your mouth goes on.
  3. Throw it in the garbage — don’t flush down the toilet.

Emergency contraception helps prevent pregnancy if you’ve had unprotected sex or are not sure if you’re protected from pregnancy. You can use EC to help prevent pregnancy if a condom broke or leaked, no birth control was used, a regular method of birth control wasn’t used correctly or there was a sexual assault. EC should be used as soon as possible after unprotected sex.

There are two types of EC:

Copper IUD

  • a small soft t-shaped device with a copper wire wrapped around it
  • can be put into the uterus by a health care provider up to 7 days after unprotected sex
  • can be left in as a regular form of birth control for 5-10 years
  • reduces the risk of pregnancy after unprotected sex by 99%

Emergency Contraception Pills

  • two types (levonorgestrel and ulipristal acetate).
  • can be used up to 5 days (120 hours) after unprotected sex.

EC doesn’t protect you from STIs or HIV. Although repeat use of emergency contraception pills is safe, they should not replace a regular method of birth control as they do not work as well and can have more side effects. 

IUDs are a safe and highly effective method of birth control. There are two types of IUDs (copper and hormonal).

It depends on the method of birth control. Birth control methods only work properly when used as directed. Using more than one type of hormonal birth control is unsafe and can lower effectiveness. Using a male or vaginal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD is called ‘dual method’. Dual method use provides the best protection from pregnancy, STIs and HIV. However, it’s important never to use two male condoms or a vaginal and a male condom at the same time, as the risk of both breaking increases.

Abstinence means different things to different people. It may mean making the choice not to have any sexual contact including:

  • self-touch (masturbation)
  • vaginal sex (penis to vagina)
  • anal sex (penis to anus)
  • oral sex (mouth to anus or genitals)
  • hand sex (hands to genitals)

For some people, abstinence may include certain types of sexual contact.

You can’t get pregnant if you are abstinent (when there is no genital contact). You can get pregnant if sperm is near the opening of the vagina. You can’t get STIs if you don’t have skin-to-skin contact or pass body fluids between partners.

Withdrawal is often referred to as ‘pulling out’. Withdrawal is used during sex to reduce the risk of pregnancy. Withdrawal is when the penis is pulled out of the vagina before ejaculation (cum). A person must not ejaculate near the genitals. Pregnancy can occur if sperm is near the genitals or in the vagina.

With typical use (not following the exact directions) withdrawal is 78% effective. It requires self-control and it can be hard to stop and withdraw the penis before ejaculation.

The cost of birth control depends on where you buy it and the type of method used. To find out about the cost talk to your health care provider or go to a sexual and reproductive health clinic. Many sexual and reproductive health clinics offer some types of birth control at low or no cost.

The timing of when people have sex, doesn’t affect how well the pill works. The pill works to prevent pregnancy by changing the hormone levels in the body over a whole month. It is taken every day, ideally at the same time each day to prevent pregnancy.

The pill is 91% effective with typical use (not following the exact directions). Most pregnancies happen because people forget to take their pill.

It’s safe to use the pill for many years—there’s no need to take a break. Talk to your health care provider to see if the pill is right for you.

In a 28-day birth control package there are a certain number of hormone-free pills, sometimes called sugar pills. They are reminder pills that help you stay on schedule and start your next package on time.

Depending on the brand of pill, the number of hormone-free pills can vary from 2-7. These hormone-free days are when you will get your period. You are still protected from pregnancy during this time.

You can get birth control from a sexual and reproductive health clinic, your family doctor or a walk-in clinic. First, you’ll want to make an appointment with your family doctor or go to a sexual and reproductive health clinic or drop-in clinic. Write down questions and concerns before your appointment to help you remember them. Information you share during your appointment is kept confidential. You can also ask a trusted adult or friend to come to the appointment with you.

A pregnancy can occur at any time during your menstrual cycle. There are times in your cycle when it may be less likely to become pregnant, but these times are hard to predict, especially if your periods are not regular. It can take many months of tracking to become familiar with your menstrual cycle. Use a regular method of birth control to prevent pregnancy. Where you are in your menstrual cycle doesn’t affect how likely you are to get an STI.

Use a condom every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Dual method use (using a male or vaginal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD) provides the best protection from pregnancy and STIs.

Yes. Testicular cancer is most common in males between 15-29 years. Everyone who has testicles should know what their testicles normally feel like. Many people find cancer by noticing a change in one or both testicles. The best time to feel the testicles is just after a warm bath or shower. The heat from the water makes the scrotum relaxed and the testicles descend more so they are easier to feel. It is recommended to check your testicles (do a self-exam) monthly and to see your doctor right away if you think you notice a change.

Prostate cancer is rare before age 40. The risk of prostate cancer goes up with age. While some males in their 40’s do get it, the risk is higher after age 50.

Yes. Some strains of HPV can cause cervical, throat, vulvar, anal and penis cancers. HPV, or Human Papillomavirus, is a viral STI.

HPV is the most commonly spread STI in the world. Approximately 75% of people who are having sex will have at least one HPV infection in their lifetime. There are over 100 strains for HPV. Low-risk strains of HPV, which can cause genital warts, often go away on their own. Higher-risk strains of HPV can cause cancer.

Many people who get HPV will not even realize it, since most types of HPV cause no visible signs or symptoms. HPV is very contagious and can be spread by skin-to-skin contact in the genital area or during genital, anal, or oral sex.

You can reduce your risk by getting the HPV vaccine, limiting your number of sexual partners, and using a condom and/or dental dam. If you have a cervix, a pap exam can screen for abnormal cells in your cervix from HPV that could lead to cervical cancer. All people can visit their health care provider or sexual health clinic for a health exam, which can look for genital warts and/or other signs of cancer in the genital, anal, or oral areas.

HPV can be prevented by getting the HPV vaccine, limiting your number of sexual partners, and using a condom and/or dental dam. The HPV-9 vaccine (Gardasil) is up to 90% effective at protecting against the nine types of HPV most commonly responsible for genital warts and HPV-related cancers.

In Alberta, HPV vaccination is available to all grade 6 students. Since the vaccines were developed to prevent HPV, and not treat it, the vaccine will work best if given before a person has any sexual contact (oral, anal, vaginal, or skin-to-skin contact in the genital area).

For people with a cervix, pap tests can screen for cervical cancer caused by HPV. Current recommendations are to begin having regular Pap tests starting at age 25, or 3 years after becoming sexually active, whichever is later.

 

 

Cervical cancer happens when some of the cells on the cervix become abnormal, then grow out of control. Abnormal cervical cells rarely cause symptoms. A person may have some of the symptoms below if those cell changes grow into cervical cancer:

  • bleeding from the vagina that’s not normal (e.g., bleeding between menstrual periods, after sex, or after menopause)
  • pain in the lower belly or pelvis
  • pain during sex
  • vaginal discharge that’s different than usual

Cervical cancer is mostly prevented by screening and follow-up care. Regular Pap tests can find abnormal cell changes in the cervix early—before they become cancerous. HPV causes almost all cases of cervical cancers in women. The HPV-9 (Gardasil) vaccine is up to 90% effective at protecting against the nine types of HPV most commonly responsible for genital warts and HPV- related cancers.

A menstrual cup is a specially designed silicone or plastic cup put in the vagina to catch menstrual fluid before it leaves the body. To use the cup, you squeeze it and insert it into the vagina far enough you don’t feel it. It opens up against the walls of the vagina. To empty the cup, you squeeze the cup to separate it from the side of the vagina, carefully pull it out, pour the contents into the toilet, rinse with warm water and put it back in. There are instructions on the package and even good internet videos that explain how to use it more fully.

Periods usually last 4-6 days.  If your period is more than 7 days, talk to a health care provider.

Periods (also called menstruation) often happen predictably, with a similar number of days between the first day of one period and the first day of the next. Most people have periods every 21-35 days apart. This means people do not get periods on the same day every month. Some have irregular periods so the space between periods is not similar. Irregular periods are more common in the first few years of menstruation. 

Bad periods may mean things like bad cramps, heavy bleeding, long periods (>7 days), bad headaches, nausea and mood swings. Most people do not get really bad periods, but some do. Bad periods can be the sign of a problem so talk to a health care provider.

Yes. When people have their period (also called menstruation), they can do the same things they can do when they don’t have their period. You cannot use pads in water, so people need to use a tampon, menstrual cup or period swimsuits to swim.

Yes, you can. Some people choose to have sex during their period, others do not. Sex during periods is a higher risk for STI transmission because of the blood and because genital tissue is more delicate during periods. There also can be risk of pregnancy from sex during a period. Use a condom every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV.

Menstruation is also called ‘having your period’. It is the time of the menstrual cycle where the blood and tissue lining of the uterus come out through the vagina.

During puberty, the ovaries start to mature eggs to get ready for reproduction. As this is happening, the lining of the uterus builds up with tissue and blood. The ovaries then release one, or sometimes more, of the eggs into the fallopian tube. If sperm are in the fallopian tube, the egg may get fertilized. The fertilized egg travels down the fallopian tube to the uterus where it implants into the lining. This is a pregnancy. If the egg is not fertilized, it dissolves in the fallopian tube and is reabsorbed by the body. This tells the uterus to move the built-up blood and tissue out of the uterus through the vagina. This is called menstruation or having a period. A person’s period usually lasts 3 to 7 days. The time between the beginning of one period to the next is called the menstrual cycle. A menstrual cycle lasts about 24 to 38 days but can vary from person to person.

No, menstruation stops during pregnancy and during menopause. Menopause is when the ovaries no longer produce estrogen and stop releasing eggs (ovulating). Menopause is a gradual process where the body permanently stops having periods. This usually happens when a person is about 40-50 years old. 

Menstrual or period cramps are the uterus contracting to push out the menstrual flow. The hormone changes that happen during the menstrual cycle can also lead to cramping. Cramps usually happen just before or just when the period starts (the bleeding part of the menstrual cycle).

Cramps can feel like a dull ache or a sharp squeeze in the lower abdomen (the area between the belly button and groin) and may also cause pain or discomfort in the lower back, hips and thighs. The intensity of cramps can vary from person to person and can change throughout a person’s life. If the pain is interfering with your daily life, talk to a healthcare provider.  

 

PMS is short for Premenstrual Syndrome. A week or so before menstruation the body begins making more of the hormones estrogen and progesterone. These hormones can cause feelings and symptoms that together are called PMS. Symptoms of PMS can include cramps, tender breasts, sore back, tiredness, bloating, headaches and feeling irritable or emotional.

Not everyone experiences the same symptoms of PMS, and some people might not have any symptoms at all.

People usually get their first period between 10-14 years old, but it is different for everyone.

Yes, it’s normal. For the first four years after getting your first period, your period might show up at irregular times and be difficult to predict. It’s a good idea to keep track of when your periods happen, either by noting them on a calendar or using an app on a smart phone. If your periods were regular but have become irregular, or you are having sex and haven’t gotten your period, see a health care provider.

Puberty takes place over several years. It also happens in stages, not all at once. Periods are also called menstruation. Menstruation doesn’t happen until all parts of the reproductive system have matured. Your first period will usually occur around age 10 – 14, usually with two years or so of noticing the first changes of puberty. If you have not yet had a period by age 15, or within two to three years of starting puberty, it’s best to talk to your doctor.

When you first get your period (also called menstruation), you may feel like your underwear is wet. It may not feel much different from any discharge you’ve had before. You may also notice blood when wiping after going to the washroom. Sometimes you can feel a small gush of blood, especially if you stand up after you’ve been sitting or lying down for a while.

Menstruation is a normal part of life. You can do everything you would normally do, if you weren’t having a period.

Although it can look like a lot more, there’s only about 60 to 80 ml (4-6 tablespoons) of blood every period. Some people lose less blood and some more.

You can act the same as when you’re not having your period. Menstruation is a normal part of life—you can carry on as usual.

No, only you know you’re having your period. It’s not something other people can see or tell by looking at you.

The colour of menstrual flow can be anywhere from bright red or pink to dark brown or red. Blood, soft tissues and other fluids make up the menstrual flow, which is why it is mostly blood coloured. 

There are commercials on TV that use a blue fluid to show menstrual flow on a menstrual pad.

You can change menstrual pads as often as you want but make sure you always change them before they’re soaked. You can buy menstrual pads in different thicknesses and absorbencies. You may need to try a few types to find what works best for you. You might find that you can use thinner, lighter pads at the beginning and end of your periods, and thicker, more absorbent pads at night. It’s important to follow the directions that come with the pads.

Change tampons every 3 to 4 hours, no matter how light the bleeding is, to avoid getting toxic shock syndrome (TSS). Tampons shouldn’t be left in longer than 8 hours, so some people choose to wear a pad at night.

If you get your period unexpectedly and don’t have a menstrual pad or tampon, ask a friend, teacher or school nurse for one. You can also make a pad with toilet paper until you can find a pad or tampon. It’s a good idea to keep extra pads or tampons in a backpack, bag or your locker just in case.

If you can’t change right away, try tying a sweater or jacket around your waist. Change your clothes as soon as you can. Rinse your clothes as soon as possible so your clothes don’t stain.

Menstrual pads and tampons come in different absorbencies. Choose the right one for you. Try using a calendar or app to track your periods so you’re not caught by surprise. You can carry extra pads or tampons in your bag or locker or ask a teacher or another adult for help. Some people choose to wear darker clothing when they’re having their period or when it’s due.

No, you don’t have to use menstrual pads. People can choose from a few items: pads, tampons, period panties and reusable menstrual cups. 

Pads stick onto the inside of the underwear to stay in place and absorb the menstrual fluid.

A tampon is put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body.

A menstrual cup is a specially designed silicone or plastic cup put in the vagina to catch menstrual fluid before it leaves the body.

Period panties absorb menstrual fluid. They can be used with, or instead of, other products, depending on how much menstrual fluid is released. 

Only a person with a uterus and ovaries can menstruate (have a period).

Yes, you still have your regular periods after having your tubes tied (tubal ligation). The body just absorbs the unfertilized egg instead of it coming out in the menstrual flow.

Although the average menstrual cycle is 28 days long, irregular periods are common during puberty. If there is a chance of a pregnancy, you should take a pregnancy test and see a health care provider. If it’s not possible that you could be pregnant, but it’s been a while since your last period, speak with a health care provider.

A tampon is a plug made of soft, absorbent material that is pressed together to form a cylinder-like shape. Tampons are inserted into the vagina during menstruation to absorb the menstrual flow (blood and shed tissue). Tampons are available with and without applicators and come in different sizes and absorbencies.

Yes, tampons are safe if used correctly. A tampon is a product put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body. Following the directions helps make sure tampons are safe and comfortable. Leaving a tampon in too long, using one that is too absorbent for the flow or using it when there isn’t a period, can cause problems. Tampons are not meant to be left in longer than 8 hours, so some people choose to wear a pad at night.

Toxic shock syndrome (TSS) is a rare but very serious infection that can happen if a tampon is not used properly. If you are using a tampon and get a fever or a rash, remove the tampon and call HealthLink at 811 or go to the hospital right away. To prevent TSS, change tampons every 3 to 4 hours, no matter how light the bleeding is. 

A tampon is put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body. Tampons are available with and without applicators. When learning, it’s usually easier to use ones with applicators. Follow the directions that come with the tampons. Most also have diagrams included.

Before inserting a tampon, wash your hands with soap and water. Find a comfortable position, squatting or sitting with your legs apart or having one foot on the toilet seat. Once you have found a position that is comfortable for you:

  • Hold the applicator securely at the grip marks with your thumb and middle finger.
  • Insert the top part of the applicator into your vagina at a slight angle upwards and towards your lower back.
  • Continue to slide the applicator into the vagina until your hand that’s holding the applicator touches your body.
  • With your index finger, push the bottom of the applicator all the way up. This pushes the tampon out of the applicator and into your vagina.
  • Gently pull the applicator out and throw it in the garbage.

The tampon will remain inside of your vagina, the string will hang outside the vaginal opening. When it is time to remove you can gently pull on the string until the tampon is all the way out. Wash your hands after you remove the tampon. Throw the used tampon in the garbage. Do not flush it.

If the tampon is in correctly, you should not be able to feel it. If it feels uncomfortable, it may not be in far enough and you can remove the tampon and try again with a new one.

A tampon is put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body. They have an attached string that hangs out of the vagina so they’re easy to remove. Even if the string goes inside of the vagina, the tampon can’t “get lost”. A person can use their finger to remove a tampon aiming the finger towards the tailbone, not belly button. Squatting and pushing a little moves the tampon closer to the opening. If you’ve inserted a tampon and are unable to remove it, it is important to seek medical attention, as there is a risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) if the tampon is left in too long.

No. A tampon is a product put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body. Virginity is a term that refers to when someone has not yet chosen to have sex, or sexual activity, with another person. Using a tampon is not having sex.

TSS stands for Toxic Shock Syndrome, which is caused by a bacteria. More than 9 out of every 10 cases of TSS are linked to using tampons during menstruation. A tampon is a product put in the vagina to absorb menstrual fluid before it leaves the body.  Learning about how to use tampons helps to decrease the risk of TSS.

Some symptoms of TSS are headache, sore throat, sudden fever, vomiting, diarrhea, achy muscles and a rash that looks like a sunburn.

To prevent TSS, change tampons every 3 to 4 hours, no matter how light the bleeding is. Tampons shouldn’t be left in longer than 8 hours, so some people choose to wear a pad at night.

Peri-menopause is the time leading up to menopause. Most people will notice the physical and emotional changes of peri-menopause in their late 30’s or as late as the early 50’s when their menstrual cycle begins to change. During this time, hormone levels go up and down unevenly (fluctuate), causing changes in periods and other symptoms.

Menopause is when a person has no menstrual period for 12 months in a row. This can happen when a person is in their mid 30’s all the way to early 60’s, but is most common between ages of 45-55.

Menopause is experienced differently by everyone. Some have no symptoms while others have many physical and emotional symptoms.

No, people don’t need to get the father or anyone else’s permission for an abortion. Only the pregnant person has rights over their pregnancy. It’s a crime to use threats, bullying or violence to force someone to get or not get an abortion.

Abortions are legal, very safe and the cost is covered by Alberta Health Care.

An abortion is a medical procedure to end a pregnancy. Given by specially trained doctors, they are legal and very safe. A person’s beliefs and values help them decide what is right or wrong for them.

Yes, abortion is legal in Alberta. People don’t need to get someone else’s permission for an abortion, they don’t need to be a certain age and the cost is covered by Alberta Health Care.

People of any age can get an abortion. They don’t need to get someone else’s permission and the cost is covered.

An abortion is a medical procedure done by a specially trained doctor to end a pregnancy. There are 2 types:

  • Medication abortion (up to 9 weeks). Medicine stops development of the fetus and causes uterine contractions. The fetus comes out through the vagina over the next day or so at home.
  • Surgical abortion (up to 20 weeks). In a clinic, the person gets medicine to lessen discomfort and the doctor uses instruments to remove the pregnancy.

People can call the clinic themselves for an abortion. They don’t need to get someone else’s permission, they don’t need to be a certain age, and the cost is covered by Alberta Health Care.

An abortion is a medical procedure to end a pregnancy. Abortions given by specially trained doctors are legal and are very safe. People don’t need to get someone else’s permission for an abortion, they don’t need to be a certain age and the cost is covered by Alberta Health Care.

If two eggs are released at the same time, and they are both fertilized and implant in the uterus, this results in fraternal twins.

If a fertilized egg splits into two zygotes that both develop into embryos that implant in the uterus, this results in identical twins.

Pregnancy tests are fairly accurate 2 weeks after the sex has happened. If the test says positive, it is probably accurate. If it says negative, it is a good idea to take the test again a week later.

Taking a pregnancy test at least 2 weeks after sex is the best way to know if you’re pregnant. Some people don’t notice any pregnancy signs. Some people notice things like mood changes, tender breasts, headaches, nausea, having to pee a lot, missed periods and fatigue.

Any time a penis or sperm come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s a risk of pregnancy. Using emergency contraception as soon as possible can lower the chance of pregnancy. People who have been sexually assaulted can call or text 1-866-403-8000 to talk about services, support and choices.  

Anal is slang for anal sex, where a penis is inserted into the anus (bum hole). The anus is not connected to the uterus, so pregnancy is very unlikely from anal sex. However, sperm can travel from the anal area to the vagina, so a pregnancy is possible. The risk of pregnancy is much lower than from vaginal sex. Correct and consistent birth control lowers risk of pregnancy. Condoms also lower STI risk.

“Withdrawing” means pulling the penis out of the vagina before ejaculation. Yes, there’s a risk of pregnancy with withdrawal. There are sperm in pre-ejaculatory fluid, which is always at the tip of an erect penis. Sometimes, people don’t notice early enough to pull out before ejaculating.

Yes. Any time a penis or sperm come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s risk of pregnancy. There are sperm in semen and in pre-ejaculatory fluid, which is always at the tip of an erect penis.

For a pregnancy to happen, sperm must fertilize an egg. Any time a penis or semen come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s risk of pregnancy. A transgender woman may be able to get someone pregnant.

People using the pill as directed don’t usually get pregnant. If you are taking the pill and think you are pregnant, you can take a pregnancy test. If the pregnancy test is negative, keep taking the pill as normal. If the pregnancy test is positive, stop taking the pill and see your health care provider.

Pregnancy happens when a sperm fertilizes an egg, and the fertilized egg attaches to the lining of the uterus (implantation).

People can get pregnant by having vaginal sex. People can also get pregnant with fertility treatments that involve the help of a health care provider. Any time a penis or sperm come in contact with the vaginal area, there is a chance of pregnancy.

Someone can get pregnant as soon as they start to release eggs (ovulate). A sign that ovulation has started is the onset of menstruation (a period). Most people will get their first period sometime between 9 and 16 years old—everyone’s different.

Sexual positions have no impact on pregnancy. Pregnancy occurs if sperm fertilizes an egg, and the fertilized egg attaches to the lining of the uterus (implantation). Any time a penis or sperm come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s a chance of pregnancy.

No, you can’t get pregnant from kissing. Pregnancy happens when a sperm fertilizes an egg, and the fertilized egg attaches to the lining of the uterus (implantation).

Yes, you can get pregnant when you’re menstruating and right after you stop. Any time a penis or semen is near the vagina, there is a chance of pregnancy.

It’s very unlikely that ejaculate (which contains sperm) could get through several layers of clothing. Pregnancy can happen when ejaculate or pre-ejaculate gets in the vagina or on the vulva. Any time a penis or sperm come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s risk of pregnancy.

No, you can’t get pregnant from semen just floating in a hot tub. The temperature of the water is too high for sperm to survive.  However, if you have sex in a hot tub and sperm enters the vagina, there is a risk of pregnancy. 

No, you don’t have a period (menstruate) when you’re pregnant. During pregnancy, the egg is fertilized and has attached (implantation) to the lining of the uterus. Some people have spotting (a small amount of blood come out the vagina) when they’re pregnant. This is from hormones causing a small amount of bleeding from the uterus. It’s different from a period where the uterine lining is shed. If a pregnant person has blood come from the vagina, see a health care provider. If it’s enough to soak a pad in an hour or less, go to emergency department of a hospital.

A baby is made when an egg cell made in the ovaries is joined (fertilized) by a sperm cell made in the testicles and implants in the uterus where it can grow into a baby. This usually happens through sex, where a penis is inserted into the vagina and the penis releases fluid called semen that contains sperm. The sperm travel through the cervix, the uterus then into the fallopian tubes. If an egg has been released around the same time, fertilization happens. The fertilized egg travels and attaches to the uterus and starts developing into a baby.

Sperm don’t have eyes. Sperm cells travel to the egg by moving their tail back and forth in a swimming motion. It’s not known for sure how sperm finds the egg. Some scientists think it’s random and some think that the egg and sperm have special chemicals on them that attracts sperm to egg. 

Within the egg and the sperm, there are chromosomes that decide the biological sex of the baby. Eggs only carry X chromosomes and sperm carry an X or a Y chromosome. If a sperm with a Y chromosome fertilizes the egg, the cell develops into a male (X+Y). If a sperm with an X chromosome fertilizes the egg, the cell develops into a female (X+X).

Yes, pregnancy can occur the first time you have sex. Use a condom every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Dual method use (using a condom or vaginal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD) provides the best protection from pregnancy, STIs and HIV.

A person is usually pregnant for about 9 months. Healthcare providers talk about pregnancy lasting 40 weeks, because they count part of the time before implantation as part of the pregnancy.

During birth, the baby travels out of the uterus through the cervix and into the vagina. The vagina stretches as the baby moves out of the body. The uterus is a muscle, it contracts and relaxes (having contractions) during labour to push the baby out.

Labour and birth usually hurts. Labour pain is caused by the uterus contracting, the opening of the cervix and stretching of the vagina. As labour progresses, the contractions become stronger, longer and closer together. This allows a baby to be born. If there are problems during the birth, like the baby having a hard time getting out, a doctor can do a surgery called a C-section (caesarean) and take the baby out the mother’s abdomen. There are many options for pain relief during labour.

The vagina stretches if the baby is born through the vagina. It slowly returns to its non-delivery shape by 6-8 weeks after the baby was born.

Stretch marks are lines on the skin that may appear late in pregnancy. Stretch marks are most common on the stomach, but they can also develop on the breasts and thighs. The cause of stretch marks is not well understood. They may be caused by increasing pregnancy hormones and stretching of the tissue under the skin. Stretch marks will fade to white lines after birth. Not all people get stretch marks during pregnancy.

Drugs can pass through the placenta to the developing baby and may affect their health and development.  Pregnant people should talk to their health care provider about any medicine, vitamin and mineral supplements or other drugs they are taking. During pregnancy, the placenta and umbilical cord connect a woman to the baby.  

Developing babies who’ve been exposed to other drugs such as fentanyl, ecstasy, methamphetamines, cocaine, and heroin are at risk for problems like:

  • birth defects
  • the placenta separating from the uterus before birth
  • preterm birth
  • low birth weight

Pregnant people should not use cannabis (marijuana, hashish, hash oil). Developing babies exposed to cannabis are at higher risk for low birth weight.  After they’re born they might not be able to self-soothe and have problems with sleep. There may also be long-term effects such as:

  • abnormal brain development
  • slower growth
  • learning disabilities and behaviour concerns

Drinking alcohol anytime during pregnancy can harm the baby. Alcohol passes through the placenta to the growing fetus. A fetus’ liver isn’t as developed as an adult’s, so it can’t break down the alcohol as fast. This means that a fetus’ developing organs are exposed to the effects of alcohol for longer.  

Drinking alcohol during pregnancy can cause fetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD). FASD can cause birth defects, brain damage and learning difficulties for the baby.

A miscarriage is sometimes called ‘losing a baby’. A miscarriage is when the embryo or fetus dies in the uterus in the first 20 weeks of pregnancy. It’s most common in the first 12 weeks. Most miscarriages happen because the baby isn’t developing normally.

A pregnant person has 3 choices:

  • continue with the pregnancy and choose to parent
  • continue with the pregnancy and choose adoption
  • end the pregnancy by choosing an abortion

All 3 of these choices are legal and available to everyone in Alberta.

Talk to your parents, a supportive friend or adult or your health care provider for support and non-judgmental information.

Emergency contraception helps prevent pregnancy if you’ve had unprotected sex or are not sure if you’re protected from pregnancy. You can use EC to help prevent pregnancy if a condom broke or leaked, no birth control was used, a regular method of birth control wasn’t used correctly or there was a sexual assault. EC should be used as soon as possible after unprotected sex.

There are two types of EC:

Emergency Contraception Pills

  • 2 types (levonorgestrel and ulipristal acetate)
  • can be used up to 5 days (120 hours) after unprotected sex

Copper IUD

  • a small soft t-shaped device with a copper wire wrapped around it
  • can be put into the uterus up to 7 days after unprotected sex
  • can be left in as a regular form of birth control for up to 10 years

EC doesn’t protect you from STIs or HIV and shouldn’t be used as a regular method of birth control.

An abortion is a medical procedure to end a pregnancy. Mifegymiso, also known as the ‘abortion pill’ is used for medical abortions. It is a combination of two drugs, mifepristone and misoprostol. The drugs change the lining of the uterus so a pregnancy can’t continue. A prescription is required for Mifegymiso, and can be prescribed and taken up to 9 weeks of pregnancy.

No. In Alberta you do not need parental consent to get an abortion. If it is clear to the doctor and other clinic staff (counsellor, nurse, etc.) that a person understands the procedure and its risk, they can sign their own consent form. In Alberta, abortions at hospitals and abortion clinics are covered by Alberta Health Care insurance.

An abortion procedure will feel different for everyone. For many people, it feels like strong menstrual cramps.  Medicine is given before and during the procedure to help with pain and discomfort.

After abortion, most people feel relieved; some feel a bit sad. Abortion clinics offer counselling. The reason many people choose abortion is because the pregnancy would cause emotional and other problems.

A person makes the decision to have an abortion because they feel that at that time in their life, it’s the right thing to do. At another time in their life, they may make a different decision.

Having to make tough decisions about your life can bring up both positive and negative feelings. It’s important and healthy to express your feelings, including the negative ones. You might find it helps to talk to a trusted friend, adult or health care provider about what’s going on.

Yes, you can. An abortion is a medical procedure to end a pregnancy. Abortions given by specially trained doctors are very safe, 10x safer than pregnancy and childbirth. A person can get pregnant again after they have had an abortion.

Mood swings are when a person’s feelings change strongly and quickly for no apparent reason. They’re caused by hormone changes and the other physical, emotional and social changes that happen during puberty.

People might feel lonely during puberty because:

  • their friendships and activities change
  • they’re becoming more independent from their family
  • they think their situation, feelings, and thoughts are unique
  • mood swings

Talk to a trusted adult if loneliness is overwhelming so you can feel better. 

Wider hips make room in the pelvis to grow and birth a baby.

Wet dreams are also called nocturnal emissions. They’re when the penis gets hard and ejaculates (releases semen) when someone’s sleeping. This means they only happen to people who have a penis. During sleep, people with vaginas can get swollen genitals and increased vaginal fluid if they have a sexy dream or a hormone change.

People have hair all over their bodies, including their faces. People with testicles usually start to get changes in the amount, colour and coarseness of their facial hair sometime between the ages of 10 and 18.  Some people get lots of facial hair, some don’t get much facial hair until later in adulthood and some people don’t get much facial hair at all.

People have hair all over their bodies, including their faces. People with ovaries usually have the same type of facial hair before, during and after puberty. If you have ovaries and are having big changes to your facial hair, talk to a doctor to make sure that’s healthy for you. People with testicles usually find that their facial hair changes in amount, color and coarseness during puberty. 

Puberty is the time when people change from a child to an adult. Puberty is different for everyone – but we all experience physical, emotional and social changes. During puberty, your sexual organs mature and having a baby becomes possible. Everyone goes through puberty. When your body is ready to begin puberty, your pituitary gland releases hormones which cause changes in your body. You can expect a lot of changes both physically and emotionally. Your body shape may start to change, you may get acne, grow hair on your legs, underarms and pubic area and you may sweat more.

There are also social and emotional changes that happen during puberty, like being more interested in what your friends think, and becoming more aware of your emotions.

Puberty doesn’t happen at the same time for everyone. Most people start sometime between 8 and 16 and are done puberty by around age 21. The average age for kids with ovaries is a bit earlier than for kids with testicles, but that’s not true for everyone. Some doctors think those with ovaries start earlier than those with testicles because they can reproduce for a shorter time. It’s a process that can take several years. Some people start earlier and others later. It may be fast for some, and slower for others.

Pubic hair appears at different times and grows at different rates for everyone. Most people begin to grow pubic hair around ages 9-13. It also changes in both quantity and texture as puberty progresses.

Hair, no matter where it is on the body, helps to protect our bodies and regulate our body temperature.

During puberty, hormones cause the voice box (larynx) to grow larger and make the vocal cords thicker. While this is happening, some people may notice their voice sounds like it’s cracking or jumping between high and low sounds. It often happens with no warning. It can take anywhere from a couple of months to a year for the voice to finish changing.

Changes to hormones, sweat and oil glands during puberty cause body smell changes.

To feel and smell healthy, people can:

  • Wash feet, genitals, armpits and anal area every day with unscented soap and water
  • Wear clean socks, underwear and shirts every day
  • Clean pillow cases, hats and hair accessories regularly
  • Wash hair and body when you get very sweaty, oily or dirty
  • Some people use deodorant, antiperspirant or baking soda

Yes, deodorant is safe to use.

Changes to hormones, sweat and oil glands during puberty cause armpit smell changes. Wearing a clean shirt and washing armpits every day can help people feel and smell healthy. Some people use deodorant, which “covers up” the smell, antiperspirants which cover up the smell and stop some sweating or baking soda which absorbs some of the moisture and smell. Talk to your parents or health care provider about what products might be right for you.

The Canadian Cancer Society has never found proof that deodorant or antiperspirants increase the risk of cancer. Using deodorant or an antiperspirant is a personal choice.

Acne (zits, whiteheads, blackheads and pimples) are normal, especially during puberty. This is because the hormone changes make the skin oilier during puberty and the pores (openings) in the skin get clogged up with oil, dead skin cells and germs. Most people get acne in puberty; some get a lot, others get little. People can talk to a health care provider if they have bad acne and it hurts or they feel bad about it.

Even though they won’t stop acne, things that can help skin be healthy are:

  • Eating healthy, managing stress and getting enough rest, water and exercise
  • Washing the face and body every day with a facecloth and water. If using soap or cleansers, be sure they are unscented and gentle

During puberty not only does your body change, so do your feelings. A crush is when you have special feelings for another person. You may think about someone a lot, want to be very close with them and may have sexual feelings. This is a normal and healthy part of growing up.

The scientific term for a wet dream is nocturnal emissions. A wet dream is when a penis gets erect (hard), and ejaculates (releases semen) while a person is asleep. A sign that a nocturnal emission has happened is waking up in damp pyjamas and bed sheets. Nocturnal emissions usually begin during puberty as the body produces more testosterone. Some people experience them and some may find them embarrassing, but they are completely normal. Wet dreams are one sign puberty has started. 

Yes, getting erections is very normal! While people may experience erections (boners) when they are younger, they may happen more often and unexpectedly during puberty. An erection happens when the penis fills with blood, making the penis larger and harder. Some people might have many erections in a day, and others may not have any. 

A yeast infection is a common infection caused by a type of fungus called Candida albicans. A healthy vagina has a small number of yeast cells. A vaginal yeast infection means that too many yeast cells are growing in the vagina. These infections are very common. Symptoms of a yeast infection include:

  • a curdy, white vaginal discharge
  • itching and/or redness in the genital area
  • sores in the genital area that look like paper cuts
  • pain or burning when you pee

Visit a health care provider if you have any of these symptoms. Yeast is one of many different types of vaginal infections. If you do have a yeast infection, you will probably be prescribed a pill to swallow or a cream, tablet or suppository to put in the vagina.

Breasts may start growing anytime between ages 8-16. When your breast growth starts has nothing to do with how fast they will grow, or what size they’ll be.

One of the first signs that the breasts are starting to develop is a small, tender bump behind each nipple called a ‘breast bud’.

As the breasts grow, the skin stretches, causing them to feel itchy or sore. This is normal. The nipples can also feel sore. During the days leading up to a menstrual period, breasts may also be tender. 

Breasts start developing at different ages, and continue developing at different rates. Breasts may start growing anytime between age 8-16, and it could happen even earlier or later than this. Starting earlier or later does not have anything to do with how quickly breasts will develop, or what size they will eventually become.

There is no ‘normal’ age to start wearing a bra. You can decide when you want to start wearing a bra. Breasts may start growing anytime between ages 8-16.

Female breasts are mostly made of fat and other tissue, not muscle. This means that exercise won’t make your breasts bigger.

Like most parts of the body, breasts can be sore from time to time, especially if they’re pushed. One of the most common times that breasts might feel sore is when they’re beginning to develop. It’s also common for the breasts to be sore or tender during menstruation.

The average age for kids with ovaries to go through puberty is a bit earlier than for those with testicles, but that’s not true for everyone. This means that kids with ovaries may have a growth spurt earlier than those with testicles. By the end of high school, most people have stopped growing taller. Everyone is different, which is why there are people of all different heights.

In puberty, hormones cause everyone to have breast changes like growth, tenderness and hardness under the areola. For people with testicles, these changes are usually temporary. If they want, people can wear a supportive undershirt for comfort and modesty. People can talk with a health care provider if they are worried about breast changes.

The colour of hair is determined by how much melanin the hair has. Different parts of the body have hair with more or less melanin. This means that hair may be darker or lighter depending on where it is on the body.

Some people may also colour the hair on their head making it a different colour than the hair on the rest of their body.  

Every person and family are different, so there isn’t really a “should do” about talking to parents. In healthy families, people can talk about sexuality even if not everyone agrees or completely understands everything. Sometimes, even when a freak out was expected, the reaction is love and support. If there’s a chance that talking to a parent would result in abuse (e.g., hitting, threatening, name calling, kicking someone out, locking them up, or sending them to an abusive program), it’s really important to speak with a trusted adult like a counselor to decide if and how to tell parents. Here are some tips for coming out to parents.

  • If there’s risk of harm, talk in a public place, with another supportive adult present and with a plan to approach the subject.
  • Choose a calm time to talk (e.g., not when anyone is angry or upset).
  • Let the parent(s) know you have something important to talk to them about.
  • Ask the parent(s) if it’s a good time. If it is, proceed. If not, plan a time.
  • Explain the reasons you want to share this important information (e.g., stay connected, respect for relationship, etc.).
  • Say what you want from them (e.g., support, care, ideas, advice).
  • Calmly say the thing. Give them information and resources.
  • Remember that you’ve had time to think about this; they haven’t. Their initial reaction may not be how they will always feel. Give them time and space to process their reaction before insisting on any action.

Everyone’s different, so there’s no single right way to ask someone out on a date. Before you ask, it can be helpful to have a plan in mind about where, when and how you’ll ask. Tell them you’d like to go on a date. Give them details like when and where, and ask them if they’d like to come. Wait for the answer. If the person says “yes”, finish making the plans for the date together. If they say no, stay calm, and accept the answer. Say okay, even if you’re hurt or embarrassed. Don’t ask why – people don’t need a reason to say no. If you really want to date the other person, you can say something like, “can I ask you again sometime?”  If they say yes, wait a couple of weeks then ask again. If they say no, don’t ask them again. Dating is a choice; you can always say no and so can they.

You might notice signs that someone might be romantically interested in you, like they find ways to spend more time with you, talk to you more, or go out of their way to be kind to you. But these are also the same things people might do if they want to be better friends. To know for sure, you’d have to ask if the person wants to be friends or if they want to have a romantic relationship.

In Canada, people who are drunk or high cannot consent to sex and being drunk or high is not a legal defense for having assaulted someone. If both people were drunk or high and had sex and afterwards both people were happy and satisfied that sex happened, neither would raise a concern about sexual assault. If someone reports a sexual assault and both people were drunk or high, it’s often obvious who the assailant was based on their interpretation of the events, reports from witnesses or who has the most power in the relationship. Anytime someone thinks they may have been sexually assaulted, it’s important to contact a health care provider or call/text One Line for sexual violence at 1-866-403-8000

In Canada, people who are drunk or high can’t consent to sex, even if they say yes. If this has happened, it may be considered sexual assault. It’s important to see a health care provider as soon as possible to manage risks like STI, injury and, if applicable, pregnancy. It might also be helpful to speak with a counselor or call/text One Line for sexual violence at 1-866-403-8000 talk about the experience. 

It’s common to have one person who wants to have sex and the other person doesn’t. When this happens in healthy situations, both people say what they want and don’t want, the limit is respected and the person who wants sex accepts that they won’t get what they want. It’s not okay to keep pressuring, pestering, bullying, manipulating or coercing someone to have sex when they don’t want to. It’s sexual assault to continue a sexual activity when someone doesn’t want to. If any of that happens, talk with a trusted adult.

It is normal for people to have sexual feelings towards others. These feelings can make people want to be really close to someone. This is a normal and healthy part of growing up.

Although you may have sexual feelings towards someone, they may not feel the same way. Even though you may feel disappointed or sad, it is important to respect their feelings and choices and not pressure them to feel the same way.

Yes, it’s normal for people to think about sex. Some people think about it a lot and some not as much. When you go through puberty and mature physically and emotionally, it’s normal to become more curious about sex, your body and all aspects of your sexuality.

Every person is different when it comes to knowing when they are ready to have sex (oral, anal, vaginal or hand sex). Some people have sex, others don’t. Both can be normal. Personal values help tell a person when they’re ready for sex. When thinking about when they will be ready for sex, people consider the legal age of consent and personal, family, faith and cultural values. Signs of sexual readiness include:

  • Be well into puberty or older
  • Feel great about themselves, their bodies and sex
  • Set, communicate and respect sexual boundaries
  • Talk to partners about condom use, STI, birth control, sexual wants, dislikes & goals
  • Talk to health care providers about sex, protection, STI and any special health needs
  • Get and use condoms and, if applicable, birth control
  • Think about how you might respond to an unplanned pregnancy and/or STI
  • Have a mutually respectful, trusting, safe, caring relationship

It can be helpful to talk to someone you trust, like a parent, health care provider or friend.

Deciding to be intimate with someone is a very personal choice and only you can decide what is right for you. Being intimate may include kissing, sexual touching and sex (anal, oral, vaginal).  

Consent is the foundation of sexual relationships and is needed for every sexual activity, every time. Consent means that both partners agree to the sexual activity and everyone understands what they’re agreeing to.

Consent is:

  • needed for every sexual activity
  • understanding what you’re saying “yes” to
  • asking your partner if they understand what they’re saying “yes” to
  • checking in with your partner and agreeing that either of you can change your mind at any time

People can’t give consent if they’re:

  • drunk, high or asleep
  • forced, threatened, bribed, intimidated, or offered a reward to do something sexual

Any sexual activity without consent is sexual assault. If you’re having a hard time deciding whether you want to engage in sexual activity or not, talk to a parent or an adult you trust.

 

Canadian law states that the age of consent is the legal age when a person can make a decision to partake in sexual activity. By law, 16-18 year olds can consent to sexual activity, except if the:

  • other person is in a position of authority (e.g., teacher, coach, or employer)
  • sexual activity exploits them (e.g., pornography, prostitution, or trading sex for safety)

There are “close in age” exceptions to this law:

  • 14 and 15 year olds can consent to sex if the partner is less than 5 years older
  • 12 and 13 year olds can consent to sex if the partner is less than 2 years older

Children younger than 12 cannot consent to any type of sexual activity. Having sex with a child younger than 12 is against the law and is sexual abuse.

Sometimes when people ask if something’s ok, they want to know if it’s legal. There are “age of protection” laws about the age when someone is legally able to consent to sex and with who. If a sexual relationship falls outside of this law, it’s not ok. It’s considered sexual abuse and the older person can get charged with a serious crime.

Sometimes when people ask if something’s ok, they want to know if it’s healthy. Teens are much more likely to have healthy relationships with partners who are close in age. A 16 year old can legally consent to sexual activity, unless the other person is in a position of power (e.g., teacher, coach, or employer) or the sexual activity will take advantage of the person (e.g., pornography, prostitution, and trading sex for safety). Consent means that both partners agree to the sexual activity, and everyone understands what they’re agreeing to.

Deciding to be intimate with someone is a very personal choice and only you can decide what is right for you. Often, when there’s a big age gap between partners, especially when one person is a teen, some elements of a healthy relationship can be missing. There may also be more sexual pressure in these types of relationships. It’s important to decide if the relationship is healthy or not. Any healthy relationship, no matter what the age, has respect, trust, honesty, fairness, equality and good communication.

To learn more about the age of consent and sexual activity, see the question above – What is the age of consent?

It’s normal to have disagreements from time to time. They give you a chance to explore things that you disagree about, and it can help make your feelings clear.

Disagreements that often turn into fights that include yelling, criticism or harsh words are signs of an unhealthy relationship. In healthy friendships, people are respectful, kind and both people get to make decisions.  It’s a problem if you’re fighting all of the time, or if mean things are said when you’re arguing. Remember—physical fighting (punching, hitting), verbal, mental or emotional abuse is NEVER okay.

Signs of a healthy relationship are:

  • respect
  • honesty
  • communication
  • being able to be yourself
  • feeling safe
  • trust
  • equality
  • support

Take some time to think about what these fights are about. Can they be worked out in a positive and constructive way? It can be helpful to talk to someone you trust, like a parent, health care provider or friend.

Yes, stalking is a type of abuse and is against the law. Trust your instincts and get help if you feel you or someone you know is being stalked. Here are some examples of stalking:

  • following someone around or parking close by and watching where they live, work, go to school or take part in an activity
  • too many or unwanted texts, emails, phone calls and/or visits
  • contacting friends, relatives or co-workers and asking them questions about someone’s actions or whereabouts
  • threatening behaviours, like leaving notes on someone’s car, at their home and/or where they work

Yes. Sexual assault can happen to anyone by anyone. Any unwanted sexual contact is sexual assault. This includes kissing, hugging, rubbing, sexual touching, and oral, anal or vaginal intercourse. Yes, girls can and sometimes do sexually assault guys. People of any gender, age, race, faith or socio-economic status can sexually assault people of any gender, age, race, faith or socio-economic status. If the person being assaulted has an arousal reflex response like getting a hard penis, wet vagina or orgasm, it’s still a sexual assault.

Sex with genital piercings can increase the risk of STIs and other infections. The site provides easy access to the blood stream and there is a chance of being injured by the jewelry. Unsafe body piercing is a high-risk activity for blood borne infections like HIV and Hepatitis C.

Sexual lubricants (lube) lower friction during sex which can increase pleasure and lower risk of injury. Lube can go on the outside of the condom, inside the condom (only a drop), on a dental dam or on the genitals, anus or hands. Only water or silicone-based lubricants are safe to use with condoms.

“Popping the cherry” is a slang term for tearing the hymen, a piece of tissue that’s partly across the inside of the vagina. It usually stretches/wears away during childhood from activities like bike riding and gymnastics. If the hymen hasn’t stretched/ worn away and someone has vaginal sex, it might partially block the partner from entering the vagina. If the sex is forceful, it can tear, causing bleeding and pain. Because the hymen is flexible, it doesn’t always tear from first sex.

People often worry if they will know how to do sex. Sex is where one person’s body comes into contact with another person’s genital area like oral (mouth to genital), anal (penis to anus), vaginal (penis to vagina) or hand sex (hand to genitals). Everyone’s sexuality is different including how people have sex, so there’s not really one way to do it to begin with. Talking to partners about sex, your thoughts, feelings and ideas and about your sexual goals, wants and limits can help you feel more confident.

Yes, it’s normal for people to think about sex. People get sexy thoughts and feelings because of sex hormones. They can happen randomly or because of a sight, smell, touch, taste or sound. Sexual thoughts and feelings can be a normal part of growing up and in creating intimate relationships. Some people think about it a lot and some not as much. When you go through puberty and mature physically and emotionally, it’s normal to become more curious about your sexuality and your body.

The word sex means two different things:

1. an identity assigned by a doctor at birth based on what the baby’s genitals look like 

2. an activity where one person’s body comes into contact with another person’s genital area like oral, anal, vaginal or hand sex.

An orgasm includes a series of muscle contractions in the genital area and can happen at the peak of sexual excitement. It is usually associated with feelings of pleasure and a release of fluid from the vagina area or semen from the penis.

Every person is different when it comes to knowing when they are ready to have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand). Some people have sex, others don’t. Personal values help tell a person when they’re ready for sex. When thinking about when they will be ready for sex, people consider the legal age of consent and personal, family, faith and cultural values. Signs of sexual readiness include:

  • Being well into puberty or older
  • Feeling great about themselves, their bodies and sex
  • Setting sexual boundaries, communicate about them and respect them  
  • Talking to partners about condom use, STIs, birth control, sexual wants, dislikes and goals
  • Talking to health care providers about sex, protection, STIs and any special health needs
  • Getting and using condoms and, if applicable, birth control
  • Thinking about how you might respond to an unplanned pregnancy and/or STIs
  • Having a mutually respectful, trusting, safe, caring relationship

It can be helpful to talk to someone you trust, like a parent, health care provider or friend.

Yes, you can get pregnant the first time you have sex. Any time semen is near the vagina, there is a risk of pregnancy. Use a condom every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Using two methods of protection, called dual method use (using a male or internal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD) provides the best protection from pregnancy, STIs and HIV.

Sex feels different for everyone. When people are sexually aroused, are sure they want to have sex and partners communicate clearly, it usually feels good. Some people find using a lubricant can help.

Sex can hurt if people have sex before they are ready: not physically ready, like they are in early puberty, or if they are not sexually aroused; or not emotionally ready like if they are feeling embarrassed, pressured or scared. Having sex when someone’s not ready is not healthy. If sex hurts, it’s important to talk to a health care provider.

As long as sperm doesn’t get near or in the vagina, there is no risk of pregnancy. Any time a penis or semen come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s a risk of pregnancy.

Yes, you can have sex when you are menstruating. You may bleed during sex, so be prepared. Communicating with your partner about your period may help you to feel more comfortable. 

You can also get pregnant when you are menstruating. Use a condom every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Dual method use (using a condom or vaginal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD) provides the best protection from pregnancy and STIs.

Oral sex is when a person stimulates another person’s genitals with their mouth, lips, tongue or teeth.

Many STIs can be spread through oral sex. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have oral sex to reduce the risk of STIs and HIV.

Yes, oral sex is a type of sexual activity. Oral sex is when someone’s mouth touches another person’s genitals. Some people have oral sex, others don’t.  Oral sex does not have a risk of pregnancy and has a lower risk of STIs and HIV compared to other types of sex. Oral sex without a condom or dental dam has a risk of STIs because of skin-to-skin contact and passing of body fluids between partners.

Condoms and dental dams are used to cover the penis, anus or genitals before starting and during oral sex. Use a condom or a dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to lower your risk of STIs and HIV.

‘Blow job’ is a slang term for mouth to penis oral sex. Use a condom or a dental dam every time you have oral sex to lower your risk of STIs and HIV.

Anal sex can include any type of sexual activity that involves the anus. This may include penetration with a penis, toys, fingers, and/or anal play such as using your mouth and toys around another person’s anus. Some people have anal sex, others don’t. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have anal sex to reduce the risk of STIs and HIV.

Anal sex without a condom increases the risk of pregnancy if semen gets near the opening of the vagina. Use a condom every time you have anal sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to reduce the risk of STIs and HIV. Dual method use (using a condom or internal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch, ring or IUD) provides the best protection from pregnancy, STIs and HIV.

People of all sexual orientations may have anal, oral, vaginal and hand sex. Talking to partners about what feels good and interests each of you can help you know what to do. Feeling safe and that sex is a good choice can help someone feel good about themselves and that sex is something positive in their life.

Safer sex is not just about reducing the risk of pregnancy. Although two people with penises, or two people with uteruses having sex do not have to be concerned about pregnancy, there is still a risk for STIs and HIV. Condoms and dental dams are used to cover the penis, anus or genitals for anal, oral or hand sex. Use a condom or a dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to lower your risk of STIs and HIV.

Masturbation is when someone touches their own genitals for pleasure. Some people do it, others don’t. It’s a normal way for a person to learn about and explore their body. While masturbation is normal, it should be done in private.

Masturbation is normal. It’s a way for a person to learn about and explore their body and their sexual feelings. Masturbating a lot won’t hurt you. It’s only a problem if it interferes with school, spending time with friends and family or doing other things you normally like. While masturbation is normal, it should be done in private.

You don’t have to be a certain age to masturbate. It’s a normal way for a person to learn about and explore their body. While masturbation is normal, it should be done in private.

‘Rub one out’ is a slang term for masturbation. Masturbation is when someone touches their own genitals for pleasure. Masturbation is a normal way for a person to learn about and explore their body. While masturbation is normal, it should be done in private.

The penis is the passageway for urine and semen to leave the body.

Pre-cum is the slang term for pre-ejaculatory fluid. Pre-ejaculatory fluid is clear. It’s released from the penis during arousal and helps line the urethra to protect sperm that could travel down during ejaculation.

There may be sperm in the pre-ejaculate fluid. Sperm from a previous ejaculation can remain in the urethra, and then the ‘leftover’ sperm will come out the urethra in the pre-ejaculate fluid.

Semen is made up of many things like enzymes, sugar, water, protein, zinc and sperm. It is very low in calories and has little nutritional value, and will not make a person gain weight if swallowed.

Many STIs can be spread through oral sex. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have oral sex to lower your risk of STIs and HIV.

Everyone is different and some people might not like the way it tastes or the way it makes them feel. You can get STIs from swallowing semen. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to lower your risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV.

It can help to talk to people who understand that all sexual orientations and gender identities and expressions are normal and valid. Those people might be peers, or they might be trusted adults like a parent, teacher, counselor, coach, or family friend. Your school GSA/QSA might be a good place to meet new friends and allies.

Online resources available to everyone include the SOGC website https://www.sexandu.ca/lgbttq/ and the peer support page https://www.youthline.ca/ that offers support via call, text and chat.

Bi is a short for bisexual, which is when someone is sexually attracted to people of their own gender and other genders. It is a sexual orientation identity that, like all sexual orientations is normal and is just how people are.  

Transitioning is the process of changing your gender presentation in society, that can include social, medical or surgical changes. Usually, any time a penis or semen come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s a risk of pregnancy. If the testicles or uterus and ovaries have been removed, there’s no risk of pregnancy. If you are going through hormone treatment or genital surgery, it’s important to speak with your specialist about fertility, if birth control is needed and what type would be safest.

Gender is complex and can be thought of as a spectrum of possibilities, not as a binary or a choice. A person’s gender identity is their internal sense of being man or woman (boy or girl), fluid among genders or no genders regardless of their sex assigned at birth. Gender identity is a feeling that begins very early in life. Gender expression is how a person presents their inner sense of gender out into the world around them. This can include how we dress, our name, the pronoun we choose, and our social behaviours.

Sex is assigned at birth, and is based on a person’s internal and external reproductive organs, physical appearance, hormones and chromosomes. At birth, most people are assigned as male or female.

Intersex is when someone’s body doesn’t match what we traditionally think of as either male or female: they have some body characteristics of both. About 1.7% of people are intersex.

‘Tranny’ is an offensive slang term to describe a person who is transgender. People whose gender identity does not match their sex are called transgender (or “trans”). Any time a penis or semen come in contact with the vaginal area, there’s a risk of pregnancy. It’s often possible for transgender people to become pregnant or get someone pregnant.

People express and experience their sexuality in different ways, no matter what their sexual orientation. People of all sexual orientations may have anal, oral, hand and/or vaginal sex.

Coming out means telling others you’re LGBTQ2S+. You get to decide if you come out or not, who to come out to and on what timeline. In healthy families, family members accept their LGBTQ2S+ kin. Even when a freak out was expected, the reaction is love and support, but sometimes there’s also a steep learning curve. If there’s a chance a parent would abuse the person who comes out (e.g., hitting, threatening, name calling, kicking someone out, locking them up or sending them to an abusive camp), it’s really important to speak with a trusted adult like a counselor to decide if and how to tell parents. 

Here are some tips for coming out to parents:

  • If there’s risk of harm, talk in a public place, with another supportive adult present and with a plan to stay safe.
  • Choose a calm time to talk (e.g., not when anyone is angry or upset).
  • Let the parent know you have something important to talk to them about.
  • Ask the parent if it’s a good time. If it is, proceed. If not, plan a time together. 
  • Explain the reasons you want to share this important information (stay connected, respect for relationship etc.)
  • Say what you want from them (support, care, ideas, advice).
  • Calmly say the thing. Give them information and resources.
  • Remember that you’ve had time to think about this; they haven’t. Give them time and space to process before insisting on any action.

An LGBTQ+ support service may have other ideas, resources and supports related to coming out to parents. For more information: LGBTQ+ Students: A guide for counsellors

Gay means a person who’s sexually attracted to people of the same gender. You may identify as being gay after you notice you are attracted to people of the same gender. Some people notice they have same gender attraction and don’t identify as gay. Lots of people are sometimes sexually attracted to people the same gender – this doesn’t necessarily mean you are gay. 

In Alberta, students who ask to form a Gay-Straight Alliance (GSA) or Queer-Straight Alliance (QSA) club are guaranteed the right to start a group in their school, have regular meetings in a safe space, have an adult supervisor or sponsor and name the club. Below are steps to starting a GSA or QSA:

  • The first step is to notify your school leadership (principal, vice principal, etc.), so that they can find a supervisor or staff sponsor, like a teacher. The sponsor can get information about how to support you from the Alberta Teachers’ Association or Alberta Education.
  • Find other students who may want to help start up the group.
  • Pick a meeting space.
  • Advertise the group and plan your first meeting.
  • Set up ground rules/group agreements.
  • Think about possible activities, like hosting guest speakers, holding events with other school groups or writing articles for the school newspaper or website.

Transgender or “trans” means that a person’s gender identity or expression differs from what’s usually associated with the sex they were assigned at birth. In other words, how you look on the outside does not match with what you feel on the inside.

In some cases, transgender people will experience gender dysphoria, a feeling of psychological distress that comes from the mismatch between one’s gender identity and their sex assigned at birth. Sometimes this feeling goes away after puberty; other times this feeling only appears in adulthood. Some say it feels like they’ve been born into the wrong gender or the wrong body.

Safer sex is not just about pregnancy. Although two people with testicles, or two people with ovaries, do not have to be concerned about pregnancy, there is still a risk for STIs and HIV. Condoms and dental dams are used to cover the penis, anus or genitals before starting and during anal or oral sex. Use a condom or a dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to lower your risk of STIs and HIV.

It is NOT bad to be trans!

Trans is short for transgender, which is when gender identity or expression and sex assigned at birth are different. Being transgender is not bad. It is just how people are.

It’s very normal for individuals to want to express themselves in different ways and outside of traditional gender stereotypes. The clothes you wear do not determine your sexual orientation or gender identity. They simply express your unique personality.

Yes. Attraction can be fluid, which means you can be attracted to many different people. Who or what you’re attracted to can change. Being attracted to someone doesn’t always mean you want to be in a relationship with them.

Sexual orientation is a person’s emotional and sexual attraction to other people. For example, heterosexual (attracted to opposite gender); gay (attracted to the same gender); bisexual (attracted to more than one gender); and asexual (does not feel sexual attraction).

Pansexual means you are attracted to a person’s personality (who they are), not their gender, sexual orientation, or body parts. Think of “P” for person. Sexuality can be fluid (change) and may or may not reflect sexual behaviours.

If a friend tells you they’re gay, it means they trust and care about you enough to share this part about who they are. It doesn’t change who they are or who you are. It also doesn’t mean that they have a crush on you if you happen to be the same gender. It can make the friendship stronger if you thank your friend for trusting and caring about you enough to tell you.

It’s not ok to tell anyone else your friend’s sexual orientation – not only is it disrespectful, it can be unsafe for your friend.

Everyone’s different, so there isn’t really a “should do” if someone thinks they’re gay, just like there isn’t really a “should do” if they think they’re straight. However, many people find it helps to learn more about what being gay means to them, so they might look for information and support. Some people choose to tell, or come out to other people. Some people come out only to people they know will be ok with it; some only tell people they’re closest to; some tell pretty much everyone and some never tell anyone.

If a person is worried about their safety when they tell someone, it’s important they speak with a professional support person, like a guidance counsellor. Together they can come up with a safety plan for this conversation. A safety plan may include telling someone in a public location.

For more information: LGBTQ Students: A guide for counsellors

Mothers’ Day and Fathers’ Day celebrations can make it seem like a family is only normal if there’s a mom and a dad – but all families are different. Some people with same sex parents or single parents call both Mothers’ Day and Fathers’ Day something like Parents’ or Family Day. Some people who are in families without parents celebrate other special adults. Some people choose to not celebrate these days at all. Many families talk to their schools to help the school learn ways to celebrate in ways that include all families.

 

Coming out means telling others you’re LGBTQ2S+. Everyone’s different so there isn’t really a “how to”. Some people come out only to people they know will be ok with it; some people only tell people they’re closest to; some people tell pretty much everyone and some people never tell anyone else and only come out to themselves. Some people who tell others do it through private conversations, others through big announcements.

LGBTQ2S+, LGBTQ*, LGBTQ +, GLBT, LGBTTQ and LGBTQ2 are common acronyms that refer to the spectrum of sexual and gender identities including:

  • lesbian
  • gay
  • bisexual
  • transgender
  • two spirit
  • queer
  • questioning
  • intersex
  • asexual

An asterisk (*) or plus sign (+) shows there are other identities included that aren’t in the acronym. It’s meant to be an inclusive term. 

SOGIE is an acronym that stands for Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity and (Gender) Expression. Everyone has a sexual orientation, a gender identity and gender expression, so this acronym is not a synonym for LGBTQ2S+.  To learn more, check out the ‘Every Body’.

 

 

Transgender is a word used to describe people whose gender identity or expression and sex assigned at birth are different from each other. An example of this would be a person who was born with a penis, and told they are a male because they have a penis, but they actually knew they were a female. Some say it feels like they’ve been born into the wrong gender or the wrong body.

You’re an important part of your health care team. If you feel that you aren’t getting the care you need and deserve because of your sexual orientation, you have the right to find a new doctor who will better meet your needs. All individuals, regardless of their sexual orientation and gender identity, have the right to health care without judgement and are protected from discrimination at Alberta Health Services.

For a health care provider to be able to know what your health needs are, it’s important for them to see the whole person, including understanding your sexuality. When a person identifies as gay, they are gay.

Asexual describes a person who doesn’t feel any sexual attraction or desire to have sex. They may or may not still feel emotional or romantic attraction to others.

For more information: LGBTQ Students: A guide for counsellors

Demisexual describes a person who only feels sexual attraction if they already have a close emotional bond with that person.

For more information: LGBTQ Students: A guide for counsellors

Gay is a word used to describe people who are attracted to people of the same gender.

Pansexual means you are attracted to a person’s personality (who they are), regardless of their gender, sexual orientation, or body parts. Think of “P” for person.

For more information: LGBTQ Students: A guide for counsellors

Polyamory is having more than one sexual, loving relationship at the same time and with consent of all partners involved.

Both yeast and Bacterial vaginosis (BV) are imbalances of the microbes in the vaginal environment. Yeast is a fungus that lives on the human body. A yeast infection is when it overgrows and causes problems like irritation, itchiness and unusual discharge. BV is a type of vaginal inflammation caused by the overgrowth of bacteria naturally found in the vagina. Yeast is rarely sexually transmitted, and BV is not an STI.

STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections) are spread through sexual contact with another person’s genital area, semen or vaginal fluid. Every person with a vagina has some discharge. When discharge is problematic (e.g., stinky, large amounts, irritating, new colour or texture), see a healthcare professional.  

A pelvic exam is part of a regular physical checkup.  During the exam a health care provider examines the pelvic organs (vagina, cervix, uterus and ovaries).  During a pelvic exam you might be checked:

  • to make sure the reproductive organs are healthy
  • for sores and lumps on the genitals
  • for sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
  • for infections in the vagina (e.g., yeast or bacterial vaginosis)

A pelvic exam may include a Pap test. A Pap test looks for changes in the cells of the cervix. Pap tests are very important for cervical cancer screening. A sample of cells from a person’s cervix are collected and tested for changes that could lead to cervical cancer. Current recommendations are to begin having regular Pap tests starting at age 25, or 3 years after becoming sexually active, whichever is later.

PEP is post-exposure prophylaxis. This is medicine people can take after they might have been exposed to HIV. Talk to a health care provider right away if you might’ve been exposed to HIV.

Genital warts are caused by the HPV (Human Papillomavirus). They usually look like a small, bumpy zit. They can be any flesh-like color. Some people don’t notice them because they can be on the inside of the penis, vagina or anus and they’re usually painless.

It’s important to see a health care provider anytime you notice a bump on the genitals to find out what it is and how to treat it.

People who have had sexual or blood contact can speak with a health care provider to decide when and how often they should be tested for STI. It’s usually recommended:

  • before sex with a new partner
  • after unprotected sex
  • after sex with a new partner (whether a condom was used or not)
  • if you think your partners may have been exposed to an STI
  • if you have symptoms
  • every 3-6 months if you or your partners have more than one partner
  • every year with your check up

STI tests are usually a pee in a cup test plus a blood test, where a person collects some of your blood through a small needle in your arm. Sometimes the health care provider will ask to look at the genitals – this doesn’t hurt. STI testing is sometimes done by swabbing the affected area (e.g. penis, vagina, throat, anus, sore). The swab can be uncomfortable but doesn’t usually hurt very much. You can talk to the health care provider about what to expect.

STI, or Sexually Transmitted Infections, are sicknesses spread through sexual contact with another person’s genital area, semen or vaginal fluid. Sex doesn’t cause STI; it lets it spread. Regardless of if someone identifies as a virgin, if they’ve had any sexual contact, they may have been at risk of STI.

“Virgin” means different things to different people – it sometimes means never having any type of sex; sometimes it means having some types of sex but not others; some people who have been sexually assaulted identify as virgins; others don’t. All of this means that sometimes people who identify as virgin would be at risk of having an STI. Even if partners are (or say they are) virgins, getting an STI test before having sex shows mutual care and respect and can reduce risk. 

It would be extremely difficult for you to get an STI from a toilet seat. The germs that cause STIs are fragile, and they have a hard time surviving outside of the body. STIs are also not spread through casual contact such as shaking hands or hugging. STIs spread through sexual contact involving the genitals, mouth or anus/rectum. They also spread:

  • through skin-to-skin contact (e.g., kissing, non-penetrating sex or body rubbing)
  • By mixing infected body fluids (such as blood, semen or vaginal secretions)
  • by sharing needles, other drug paraphernalia and through needle stick injuries
  • by sharing razors, nail clippers, unclean or used tattoo equipment, piercing or acupuncture equipment
  • from a pregnant person to their unborn baby, as the baby is being born during a vaginal delivery
  • through breastmilk to a baby
  • when sharing things like clothing, bedding and linens

Cold sores are small, painful blisters on and around the mouth, lips and nose. Yes, they are caused by the herpes virus. Many people have herpes. It’s very contagious and can be spread by sharing drinks, kissing and sexual contact. It’s only called an STI if a person catches the herpes virus through sex.  

Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are germs (viruses and bacteria) that spread from one person to another through any type of sexual contact. 

COVID-19 (corona virus) is spread mainly through coughing, sneezing, or direct contact with a sick person or with surfaces they have recently touched. The close contact during sexual activity places you at risk for transmission of COVID-19.

  • The safest sex partner is yourself. Masturbation will not spread COVID-19.
  • The next safest sex partner is your sexual partner(s) that you live with.
  • Avoid close contact – including sex –with anyone that you don’t live with.
  • If you do have sex with others, have as few partners as possible.
  • Avoid sex with new or anonymous partners. Consider options like phone, video, or online methods to connect. Have ongoing discussions about consent and privacy.

Delay sex, if you or your partner(s):

  • have COVID-19
  • have been a contact to a person with COVID-19
  • have been feeling unwell (e.g. fever, cough, sore throat)
  • have  travelled outside Canada in the previous 14 days

For more information, see ahs.ca/covid 

Depending on what a person is being tested for, STI testing can involve a urine sample, blood test, genital exam and sometimes a swab. Testing is encouraged for each body site where sexual contact has happened (anus, mouth, penis, vagina). Testing positive for one STI increases the risk of other STIs and HIV.

STI testing is available at:

Any information you share with your health care provider is confidential. The personal information you give is used to provide the best care, order tests and contact you about the results. If results are positive for any reportable infections, the information is then shared with the provincial STI services program.

A virus is a kind of germ that’s so small even a regular microscope can’t see it. Viruses are the smallest and simplest of all germs, but they are also some of the deadliest. Different viruses cause different diseases. Vaccines can prevent some viruses.

Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) caused by a virus (like Herpes and HIV) can’t be cured, but can be treated to help manage symptoms. STI has replaced the term STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease). In medical science, infection is the term used to talk about a bacteria, virus, parasite or other microbe that has entered the body and begun to multiply. The term disease indicates that signs and symptoms of illness are present. There are many people with STIs who have no symptoms, therefore STI is a more accurate term.

Many STIs don’t have symptoms, especially when the infection first starts. When an STI is found and treated early, it can lower the chances of having complications and can prevent the infection from spreading to sexual partners. As with any infection, prevention is important. You can prevent getting an STI by:

  • talking to your partner about using protection and each other’s history of STIs, before sexual activity (anal, oral, vaginal, hand sex)
  • getting tested regularly (every 3-6 months) for STIs, if you’re sexually active with different partners, even if you don’t have any symptoms
  • completing STI treatment if needed
  • getting immunized against Hepatitis AHepatitis B and Human Papillomavirus (HPV)
  • regularly using barrier methods of protection such as condomsvaginal condoms and dental dams
  • limiting the number of your sexual partners
  • using HIV Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (HIV PrEP) if you are at high risk for HIV exposure

Most STIs are curable; all are treatable. Symptoms of STIs can include:

  • pain in the genitals, abdomen or with urination or sex
  • sore, lump, rash, irritation, itching in the genitals or area of sexual contact
  • unusual discharge, bleeding or bad smell in the genitals or area of sexual contact
  • general feeling of un-wellness, swollen glands, body rash, vision problems

All STI can have unpleasant symptoms if untreated. Untreated chlamydia and gonorrhea can cause serious problems if untreated. HPV could also lead to genital warts or lead to cancer. HIV, Hep C and syphilis can be fatal if untreated.

STIs spread through sexual contact involving the genitals, mouth or anus. Some infections can also be spread through other means such as:

  • skin-to-skin contact (e.g., kissing, non-penetrating sex or body rubbing)
  • mixing infected body fluids (such as blood, semen or vaginal secretions)
  • sharing needles, other drug paraphernalia and through needle stick injuries
  • sharing razors, nail clippers, or unclean tattoo equipment
  • from a pregnant woman to her unborn baby, as the baby is being born during a vaginal birth
  • through breastmilk to a baby

Use a condom or dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal, hand) to reduce the risk of STIs and HIV.

Yes, oral sex without using a condom, vaginal condom or dental dam has a risk of an STI and HIV because of skin-to-skin contact and passing bodily fluids between partners. Oral sex is a high or moderate risk activity for many STIs, including syphilis, chlamydia, HPV and herpes. It’s a lower risk activity for HIV & Hep C. Use a condom or dental dam every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) to reduce the risk of STIs and HIV.

No, you can’t get an STI from kissing. STIs, or Sexually Transmitted Infections, are passed between sexual partners through oral, vaginal, or anal sex. There are some infections that people can get through sex or through other ways. For example, HSV (herpes simplex virus) can be passed through sex or by things like kissing or sharing lip balm. If it was passed through sex, it’s considered an STI. If it was passed through something like kissing or sharing lip balm, it wouldn’t be considered an STI.

It would be extremely difficult for you to get an STI from a toilet seat. Sex germs are fragile, and they have a hard time surviving outside of the body. STIs are also not spread through casual contact such as shaking hands or hugging. STIs spread through sexual contact involving the genitals, mouth or anus/rectum. They also spread:

  • by skin-to-skin contact (e.g., kissing (oral herpes), non-penetrating sex or body rubbing)
  • by mixing infected body fluids (such as blood, semen or vaginal secretions)
  • by sharing needles, other drug paraphernalia and through needle stick injuries
  • from a pregnant woman to her unborn baby as the baby’s being born during a vaginal delivery, or through breastmilk
  • when sharing things like clothing, bedding and linens (specifically infestation-type STIs such as scabies and pubic lice)

HPV is the most commonly spread STI in the world and approximately 75% of people who are having sex will have at least one HPV infection in their lifetime. There are over 100 strains for HPV. Low-risk strains of HPV, which can cause genital warts, often go away on their own. Higher-risk strains can cause cancer.

Many people who get HPV will not even realize it, since most types of HPV cause no visible signs or symptoms. HPV is very contagious and can be spread by skin-to-skin contact in the genital area or during genital, anal, or oral sex. HPV causes almost all cases cervical cancer in females and almost all cases of head and neck cancers in males under 40 in Alberta.

HPV can be prevented by getting the HPV vaccine, limiting your number of sexual partners, using a condom and/or dental dam. The HPV-9 (Gardasil) vaccine is up to 90% effective at protecting against the nine types of HPV most commonly responsible for genital warts and HPV-related cancers.

In Alberta, HPV vaccination is available to all grade 6 students. If you did not get the HPV-9 vaccine in Grade 6, you can still get it for free up to and including age 26 years.

Since the vaccines were developed to prevent HPV, and not treat it, the vaccine will work best if given before a person has any sexual contact (oral, anal, vaginal, or skin-to-skin contact in the genital area).

For people with a cervix, pap tests can screen for cervical cancer caused by HPV. Current recommendations are to begin having regular Pap tests starting at age 25, or 3 years after becoming sexually active, whichever is later.

Using condoms, vaginal condoms or dental dams every time you have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) lowers the risk of HPV. Keep in mind that the virus may be on skin that isn’t covered, so HPV can still be passed on even if condoms or dental dams are used. People who are already sexually active but haven’t been vaccinated can still get the vaccine. It may still protect them from types of HPV they haven’t been exposed to.

The HPV (Human Papillomavirus) vaccine works best if it’s given before any type of sexual contact has ever happened. Getting the vaccine before you become sexually active allows your immune system to build antibodies that will protect against HPV in the future. HPV causes almost all cases of cervical cancer in females and most of the head and neck cancers in males under 40 in Alberta.

Hepatitis is an infection in the liver that is caused by a virus. Hepatitis A, B and C are different in how they are spread, some of their symptoms, and if they are curable or treatable. People infected with hepatitis may have none, some or all of these symptoms:

  • fever
  • feeling tired
  • loss of appetite
  • nausea and/or vomiting
  • stomach pain
  • joint pain
  • the skin or the white part of the eyes turn yellow (jaundice)

Although they cause the same type of symptoms, how bad the disease is and how long it lasts is different for everyone. Each of these viruses spreads differently:

  • Hepatitis A (Hep A) is spread through fecal-oral route. Risks include oral-anal sex and consuming water/food contaminated with Hepatitis A.
  • Hepatitis B (Hep B) is spread through both blood and bodily fluids, such as semen and vaginal fluids.
  • Hepatitis C (Hep C) is spread only through direct blood-to-blood contact, or through bodily fluids that contain blood.

There’s a vaccine for Hepatitis A and Hepatitis B. In Alberta, the Hep B vaccine is offered in Grade 6. There is no vaccine for Hep C but there is treatment available.

About 90% of people with Hep B get better. About 70-80% of people infected with Hep C without treatment go on to develop a chronic or lifetime infection. With both Hep B and C, the chronic infection can lead to a serious liver disease (cirrhosis) or cancer of the liver later in life.

Depending on the type of Hepatitis, you can also reduce your risk of infection by:

  • washing your hands after using the toilet and before you prepare or eat food
  • practicing safer sex
  • not sharing personal objects that may come into contact with blood (e.g., needles, razors, toothbrushes or nail clippers)

HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus) is a virus that weakens the immune system and makes it difficult to fight diseases and infections.

AIDS (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome) is a combination of having HIV and one or more infections or diseases. Because HIV has damaged the immune system, the body can’t protect against or fight infections or diseases, and a person becomes very sick. There is no cure for HIV, but it can be treated. Medication, known as highly active antiretroviral therapy, can be taken to lower the amount of virus in the body, and keep the immune system strong, allowing people with HIV to live long, healthy lives.

HIV often has no physical symptoms, so you can’t tell if someone has HIV by looking at them.

HIV is spread through infected body fluids (blood, semen, vaginal secretions, rectal fluid and breastmilk) that get into someone’s blood.

This can happen when people:

  • have sex (anal, oral, vaginal) without using condoms, vaginal condoms or dental dams
  • share needles or other drug use equipment
  • share sex toys, razors or toothbrushes
  • have HIV and are pregnant, give birth or breastfeed
  • use unclean or used equipment for tattoos, piercings or acupuncture
  • have contact with an infected object, like a needle, by accident

The risk of getting HIV is higher if a person has other STIs.

HIV cannot be spread by:

  • saliva, tears or urine
  • talking, shaking hands, working or eating with someone who has HIV
  • hugs or kisses
  • coughs or sneezes
  • swimming pools
  • toilet seats or water fountains
  • bedsheets or towels
  • forks, spoons, cups or food
  • insects or animals

Yes, it is safe to play with someone who has HIV. HIV is spread through the following infected body fluids:

  • blood
  • semen
  • vaginal secretions
  • rectal fluids
  • breastmilk

HIV can’t be spread through saliva, tears or urine. You can’t get HIV from hugging, holding hands or being near someone with HIV or AIDS. You also can’t get HIV or AIDS from toilet seats, drinking fountains, door knobs, dishes, drinking glasses, food or pets.

There is no cure for HIV. There is treatment and medication that can help people live, long healthy lives. 

HIV Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) is a drug that helps prevent HIV in people who are at high risk of getting the virus. It is taken as a pill once a day.

HIV PrEP doesn’t prevent other STIs or pregnancy. It’s important for sexually active people to have regular STI testing and use dual-method protection (using a condom or internal condom along with another method of birth control like the pill, patch or ring).

People who are HIV negative, but are at a high risk of getting HIV. This includes:

  • Men who have sex with men (MSM), transgender women and gender diverse people reporting anal sex without a condom in the past 6 months and who:
    • have had chlamydia, gonorrhea, or syphilis in the past 12 months
    • have sex partner(s) known to be living with HIV who are not taking treatment, have HIV virus in their blood or don’t know their HIV virus levels
    • have many sex partners
  • Heterosexual people in an ongoing relationship with an HIV positive partner who is not taking treatment, has HIV virus in their blood or does not know their HIV virus levels

Other individuals who may also benefit from HIV PrEP include:

  • People who inject drugs and share injection supplies
  • Heterosexual persons engaging in sex with partner(s) who may be from a population or community with high rates of HIV
  • The medication is prescribed by health professionals who have knowledge in HIV prevention. They are called Designated HIV PrEP Prescribers.
  • To get a prescription for HIV PrEP, people must be Alberta residents with a valid Alberta Health Care Insurance Plan card. 
  • People that get a prescription for HIV PrEP can have their prescription filled at any pharmacy that has the medication.
  • For a list of Designated HIV PrEP prescribers, go here.

AIDS (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome) is caused by HIV. AIDS is the last stage of infection with the HIV. As HIV weakens the immune system it can’t fight infection or disease and this is usually what causes a person with AIDS to die. Medicine can be taken to help keep the immune system strong, allowing people with HIV to live for many years without developing AIDS.

Sores on the testicles can be a symptom of an STI—see a doctor or go to a Sexual and Reproductive health or STI clinic as soon possible to be tested.

No, the virus can only survive in human cells.

 Animation/CGI has far fewer limitations than live action, so game-based or CGI porn, can show unrealistic, unhealthy and unsafe sex, bodies, and relationships. It can also reflect racist, misogynistic or other hateful messages. In real life, if people tried to do what they see in porn, they could lead to non-consensual activities, STIs, unintended pregnancy, sexual assault charges and injury.

It is illegal for anyone under 18 to view/access/make/possess any pornography. In Canada, pornography is illegal if it shows (animated/live action/photos/drawn/implied) cruelty, horror, violence, exploitation, humiliation, degradation, animals, children, sexual assault or other crime.

Personal values tell a person what’s right or wrong for them. Most families, cultures and faiths have values about watching porn. People can talk to family, cultural and religious leaders to learn about those values.

  • It is illegal for people under 18 to view/access/make/possess porn
  • It can depict unrealistic, unhealthy or unsafe sex, bodies or relationships.
  • If people did the activities in porn, it could lead to non-consensual activities, STIs, unintended pregnancy, sexual assault charges or injury
  • Porn use can become compulsive and impact other life areas

In real life, sex is about physically and emotionally interacting with other people. Like all media, porn does not show real people’s sex experiences, and sometimes can show unsafe sex, bodies or relationships. This might give people unrealistic expectations about sex, make them feel bad about sex, and their bodies or relationships.

Porn, or pornography, is pictures or videos that show naked people, people having sex, or sexual fantasies. Porn has actors, directors, scripts, special make up and lighting and computer editing.

Here are some examples of behaviors that can be considered online abuse or harassment:

  • Using social media to keep tabs on where someone is or who they’re talking to.
  • Insulting someone privately or publicly on social media.
  • Aggressively or constantly pestering for sexts or nude photos (especially after being told to stop).
  • Demanding to look at someone else’s private messages.
  • Controlling what social media accounts someone else can have, and who they can/can’t be friends with online.

Abuse and harassment are serious both online and offline. If someone is making you feel unsafe or attacked report the harassment to someone, like your teacher or principal, at your school or to your parents. If someone (even someone you’re in a relationship with) starts harassing you and you think you may decide to report it, it can be helpful to keep a record of messages they send or other harassing behavior.

You may want to reach out for support from friends, family, or other people you trust to help you navigate protecting yourself, deciding whether to make a report, or taking care of your feelings around being harassed. It is okay to get support.

If you ask for a sext and the person says no, always take “no” for an answer and never pressure someone into sending you a sext.

If someone sends you a sext, never under any circumstances should you share it or forward it to other people.

That includes:

  • Sending it to someone else – even “just one person”.
  • Showing it to somebody else – even if they promise not to tell anyone they saw it.
  • Posting it somewhere online – even if you’re confident the person in the photo or anyone they know won’t see it.

Why? Because forwarding, sharing and posting intimate images of someone else without their consent is against the law. It’s also just wrong, and can really hurt both the person who sent the sext and the people who share it with others.

If someone sends you a sext that you didn’t ask for, delete it. You can also ask the person not to send more if you feel comfortable doing so.

You can also block the person from sending more messages.

Repeatedly sending someone sexts that they didn’t ask for can be considered harassment, which is a crime. If this is happening to you, talk to an adult you trust about getting help from a lawyer or the police.

If someone sends you a sext that you didn’t ask for, delete it. You can also ask the person not to send more if you feel comfortable doing so. Just because the sext has been shared before, doesn’t mean it’s okay for you to share it too. It hurts every time someone new sees a sext that was shared without the person’s consent.

If you know the person in the picture, let them know that you received it and that you deleted it.

Sometimes someone may share sexts that other people have sent them in the hopes that others will share sexts in return. Remember, you don’t “owe” anything to someone because they shared a sext with you and you aren’t obligated to share something back.

If you ever receive a sext, you should remind yourself that sharing and forwarding sexts/nudies/nudes:

  • is against the law if the person in the image is under 18.
  • is against the law without the person’s permission (regardless of age).
  • hurts the person in the image in ways that may last a lifetime.

There is never an excuse to share or forward a sext of someone else without their consent.

Dick pics are pictures of someone’s penis that is shared digitally. People might send these images if they were asked to, to become aroused, for entertainment or to feel like they fit in. In Canada, it is against the law to expose someone to naked pictures without their consent. It’s also against the law to send them to anyone under 18.

In Canada, it is against the law to share a sexual picture of someone without their consent. If this happens, it is a sign of a very unhealthy relationship with unequal power, disrespect and lack of care. Some people don’t realize that sharing sexts that weren’t for others could be considered cyberbullying or could be against the law. Depending on the situation, you might ask the person and their friends to stop sharing and delete the images, talk to a trusted adult or contact the police.

In Canada, naked pictures or videos of someone under 18 might be considered sexually explicit media of a minor, which is illegal. That could include photos or videos someone takes of themselves. Some people might choose to send nudes. Some people don’t realize once a photo is sent, it is no longer private and it can be hard to control who sees, shares or keeps it. If a photo gets shared that someone wanted to stay private, it can negatively impact their self-esteem, relationships, and mental health. If someone is trying to decide, some things to think about might be:

  • Think before you send.
  • Be kind and show respect. On the internet, act the same as you would face to face.
  • Never assume your message will stay private.
  • Say no when you aren’t comfortable with what is happening. Talk to a trusted adult.
  • Consider what impact a photo could have on you in the future. How would others react? How would you feel if family, friends or a boss at work saw it?
  • Don’t forward sexts. This could cause someone else harm or could even be against the law.

Nudes means naked pictures of someone. People might ask for nudes to become aroused, for entertainment, to feel like they fit in, or prove popularity by collecting images without considering the people in them. In reality, collecting explicit images of people without their consent can have serious legal consequences.

In Canada, sexting can be considered pornography, especially if it contains images or videos. It is illegal:

  • for anyone under 18 to view/access/make/possess any pornography
  • to have, share or view pornography if it shows people under 18
  • to share someone’s sexual image without their consent
  • to show someone a sexual image without their consent

Sexting is when people send or receive sexual pictures, messages, or videos through text messages, email, or social media platforms (e.g., Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, etc.). Sexting is one way to communicate in a sexual relationship and explore sexuality. Never assume sexts will stay private or are temporary. Once an image is sent, there is no limit to how much someone may share it and the image itself can live on forever. There may be no way to stop it from being sent around to a lot of people and there may be no way to get it back.

 
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